Saturday, 12 October 2013

Just Say Yes – a post about anxiety & conquering my fears


My whole life I have been a bit of a scaredy cat. I have never done anything out of my comfort zone and I have been too afraid to try anything new.

In February 2012 I had a panic attack. It wasn’t my first, but it was definitely the worst thing I have ever experienced. I still don’t feel comfortable going into the details at this stage, perhaps one day I will have a post dedicated to my anxiety and panic attacks, but you need to know some background. 

Today, I feel anxious often, but I use a variety of methods to keep panic attacks from re-occurring including cognitive therapy, controlled breathing and not doing anything out of my comfort zone. I have had a couple of panic attacks since, but nothing I haven’t been able to control.

I have missed out on so many experiences in my life so far, because I have been to scared to give them a go. It started from a very young age and is continuing today.

For example, I didn't get my ears pierced because I was scared of the pain, I didn't participate in sports days because I was afraid of failing and looking silly, I didn't go on a single show ride as a child/teenager because I was too scared, I could never put myself out there with other people because I was afraid they wouldn’t like me.

This is just a snippet of experiences I missed out on as a child because of my fears.  And I haven’t even mentioned all my other fears such as spiders, public speaking, ghosts and the dark.

Let me just get this straight before we go any further. I don’t want this to be a self-pitying blog post. So on to the fun bit.

Mark and I on the Ferris Wheel at the Show in September this year.

A month ago I decided to start conquering my fears. And no I’m not about to go hold a spider in a dark room. I’m talking about things that I have always wanted to do, but have been held back by fear.

So I have started keeping a Conquering my Fears Journal and I hope to share many of these with you as I do them! In the back is a list of challenges. It looks like this:

Just Say Yes Challenge
  • Public speaking
  • Going on a show ride
  • Getting my ears pierced
  • Flying (haven’t been on a plane since my panic attack)
  • Getting a tattoo
  • Going to Ikea (that is where my major panic attack happened)
  • Getting my Drivers Licence
  • More driving lessons
  • Going to the dentist
  • Getting a pap smear test (sorry if that’s too much info)
  • Go to see a Kinesiologist
  • Have my fortune told
  • Go horse riding
  • Go to Fiji next year
  • Go skydiving in NZ when we go in 2015

In the front of my journal I write the challenges I have completed and draw a little picture to go with them.

I have already completed a few and I will share one of these with you each week and hopefully some new ones as I complete them. The list will be constantly updated, as experiences come up in my life that I would usually turn down, because the goal is now to say yes.

Just. Say. Yes.

Livalini x


2 comments:

Helenbeee said...

Lots of challenges to look forward to conquering :) good post Livs I love the foto of you and Mark on the Ferris Wheel.

Unknown said...

Yes I am excited and a little scared but I know it'll be worth it once I do them :) LOVED the ferris wheel! it actually moves quite fast!

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